Pairing: Alex/Lorelai, Serena/Casey, Alex/Olivia
Rating: NC-17, for previous parts mainly, but this one's probably at least an R
Disclaimer: Dick Wolf, I most deeply apologize for violating and abusing your characters. Actually, you treat them worse than me. So I don't apologize. But they still don't belong to me.
Summary: Yeah, this story was done, but then i realized that the last bit sucked and i went back in and added another scene that doesn't actually make it suck less, but is at least less abrupt. And then i was bored and jotted down another scene, and then another, and then when i should have been paying attention in my Race in Latin America class i finished it up. So this fifth part is completely and utterly gratuitous and is not even pornographic enough to be worth reading. But i'm posting it anyway.
Some of this will only make sense if you read the edits I put in part 4.
“You got the job?”
Alex looked up from the phone. Lorelai was lounging on her bed in a red silk negligee that Alex was pretty certain she had stolen from the Victoria’s Secret on Fifth Avenue. It didn’t bother her. She looked hot, especially in handcuffs.
Alex smiled. “I did. I’m staying in New York.”
Alex rolled her eyes. “I didn’t say you could stay with me.”
Lorelai pouted. “You’d throw me out? Honestly? But think about it. It’s really a lot cheaper than hiring a prostitute every time you need to get off. And this way you won’t pull a Spitzer.”
“Because being linked to a larcenous freeloader is really that much better.”
Lorelai grinned. “I think it’s more likely your proclivities would get you in trouble than mine.” She lifted the braided lash off the bedside table between her toes.
“Is this blackmail?”
Lorelai rolled onto her back, half dangling off the bed. “Of course not. Think of it as… potential blackmail.”
The negligee had slithered down to rest on Lorelai’s stomach. Alex breathed through her nose.
“It doesn’t start until July though. I should probably go home until the apartment’s free.”
Lorelai froze. “Where in Connecticut?”
“Fuck, thank god.”
“As long as it’s not near West Hartford, I’m good.”
“What’s in West Hartford?”
* * *
Alex didn’t remember inviting Lorelai home with her for the month between graduation and her apartment opening up, but she didn’t think of suggesting that she find somewhere else to be. It wasn’t as if she was invested in the relationship or anything, but she knew Lorelai’s method of finding a place to sleep was going home with someone who wanted to fuck her and then not leaving. And oddly, the thought of that made her stomach churn.
Darien was close enough to the city to be considered a commuter suburb, but neither of her parents had made it to her graduation. They had both sent cards with substantial checks inside. Alex, who had never met anyone who never had enough money until Lorelai had settled in her dorm room, had begun to wonder why her parents thought giving her money meant anything at all. When Lorelai gave her an interesting leaf she had picked up in Central Park it was more of an effort than her parents giving her a thousand dollars.
Her mom at least sent a note about the goings on of the board of St. Theresa’s. She hadn’t bothered to ask how Alex was, but at least she wasn’t pretending to care. She also said that she’d be up in ‘the north country’ during Alex’s graduation making a deal for the school, and she wasn’t sure how long it would take. That was good news. The house would be empty when they got there and she wouldn’t have to explain whom Lorelai was and what she was doing there right away.
Serena wasn’t coming back to Connecticut for the summer. Her parents had moved to Japan to rekindle their romance and were flying her out with the promise that when she got bored they would give her a ticket to Hong Kong and she could make her way on her own from there. She had broken up with Casey for about the fourteenth time, and Casey was staying in the city for the summer helping coach a softball team for underprivileged kids.
Alex was actually glad Lorelai was coming with her. With all of her friends gone, Connecticut was going to be triply boring.
* * *
Four o’clock to six o’clock was naked swimming time on Lorelai’s schedule. Alex wasn’t about to complain. And on this particular Tuesday naked swimming time had turned into naked lawn chair sex and it was just about to get really good when Alex heard the door to the outside open and her mom’s voice saying, “I’m sorry I can’t offer you a drink, but I let the staff off while we were gone.”
Alex did an unexpectedly powerful sit up, knocking over the lawn chair and sending Lorelai into the pool with a loud splash. She hurriedly wrapped herself in a towel and threw the other one at Lorelai who was climbing out of the pool, spitting out water.
Lorelai shut up and grinned. Alex smiled at her mom as fakely as possible, but her mom wasn’t even looking in their direction. When Alex spoke she turned around and looked shocked.
“Alex! I didn’t know you were home. You didn’t call Marta?”
Alex wasn’t about to explain that having the staff around would hinder naked swimming time, role-play cooking time, and most of the other events Lorelai had scheduled to make Connecticut less boring. But if she had wanted to she wouldn’t have been able to form the words because the last person she had expected to see was standing behind her mother’s shoulder, grinning at her and Lorelai in a way that suggested she knew exactly had been going on before her mother opened the door, and was also quite understanding of why they hadn’t requested the return of the staff.
“H-hi, Ms. Benson.”
“Hello Alex. Congratulations on graduating. Who's your friend?”
“Ah,” Alex reached out and put her hand on Lorelai’s bare wet shoulder. “This is Lorelai.”
Olivia gave Lorelai a sharp once over. Lorelai met her critical gaze with one of her own, and one of her fierce grins.
“Lorelai?” Mrs. Cabot looked in surprise at Alex’s guest. “Not Lorelai Gilmore?”
Alex felt Lorelai’s shoulder stiffen under her hand. “Uh, no. Lorelai… Steinbachen.”
Olivia snorted. Mrs. Cabot glanced between Olivia and Lorelai. “Was that… a joke? You are Lorelai Gilmore, right? Your mother showed us a picture.”
Lorelai’s shoulders slumped. “Yeah, I’m Lorelai Gilmore.”
“What a surprise! Your mother said you were traveling. Does she know you’re back in the states?”
Lorelai seemed desperate to flee, but Alex was enjoying this.
“I haven’t… written her, recently.”
“How lucky this is. We met just this past week, working on making St. Teresa’s and Chilton sister schools. We invited her to dinner on Friday. She’ll be so happy to see you.”
Lorelai winced. “Maybe not so happy.”
Alex frowned. Something odd was going on. She looked at Olivia. “We?”
Olivia raised an eyebrow and grinned.
Alex’s jaw dropped. “Oh my god.”
* * *
Lorelai leaned back into the pillows on Alex’s bed and giggled. “So explain this to me once again. You had a kinky affair with the principal of your school senior year, and now she’s fucking your mom?”
“I think you have a perfectly good handle on the situation,” replied Alex, groaning and flopping onto the mattress next to her. Lorelai’s hand crept under her shirt and Alex rolled closer. “What about you? Dinner on Friday?”
Alex knew she had said the wrong thing when Lorelai retracted her hand. But she didn’t let her pull away. Throwing a knee over her waist, Alex grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her head. Lorelai’s wide blue eyes shimmered, and Alex felt a clench of fear in her chest that she was going to cry, “What happened?”
“I ran away.”
“I had to plan it, so carefully. I had to make them think everything was okay. Three days before my high school graduation I told them that I was going on a short trip with a few other girls in my class. That gave me a head start. I took out as much cash as I could and disappeared. I haven’t seen them since.”
“Why did you run?”
“What slave wouldn’t break her chains when she notices that they’re there?”
* * *
“I don’t know if I can deal with this.”
Olivia took a slow sip of her wine and arched an eyebrow. “I hate to break it to you, but it doesn’t have anything to do with you, Alex.”
“It doesn’t. And why should you even care? You’ve got your little toy. Tell me? Is she everything you wanted?”
Alex gave her a look, eyes glinting like chips of mica. “She’s more.”
Olivia laughed. “Really? Does she even sub for you?” She glanced over to where Lorelai was bewildering a guest with made up tales of her adventures in foreign lands. “She doesn’t look broken.”
“Some people don’t have to be broken to sub. That’s your problem, Olivia,” Alex saw her tense at the sound of her name and wanted to spit, “You’re too afraid to get on your knees because you don’t know how to trust people. But you were right not to trust me. You humiliated me for months, at school, in front of my friends. I liked being punished, but I don’t get off on that. It took me a long time to get over that anger.”
Olivia looked stunned and stared into her drink. “I didn’t know. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. You taught me a lot about myself. But… my mom?”
Olivia just shook her head and smiled.
* * *
Emily Gilmore strode into the room like a larger Napoleon, and Alex saw the ache of horror cross Lorelai’s face. She slid in behind her and rested a hand on her arm. Lorelai turned to her and at the sight of her eyes Alex wondered when she had started to care this much.
“Don’t let her take me back there.”
“I won’t, I promise.”
“Emily!” Mrs. Cabot’s cheer cut through the moment. “We have a surprise for you.”
The aisle between Mrs. Gilmore and her daughter was cleared and their eyes locked. The hurt and hope on Emily’s face was terrifying and Alex stepped in close behind Lorelai so she could feel her presence. Emily Gilmore was not going to win.
* * *
Alex was looking for Lorelai. She had lost track of her after the post-prandial brandies were passed out, and she couldn’t see Emily Gilmore anywhere either. Then she heard voices out in the yard by the fountain.
“Come home, Lorelai.”
“I’m never going back there again!”
“Why? Why do you hate us so much?” Alex stepped out of the shadows, and Emily spotted her. She gave her a look like a sharp threat.
“Why? You’re asking me why?” Lorelai was shaking her head. “You killed my baby. You drugged me and took me to England against my will and killed her.”
“I was saving your life, your future!”
“You murdered it.”
Lorelai spun to leave and saw her audience.
Alex gaped. She couldn’t process this. She turned and fled.
“Alex!” she heard Lorelai shout, but she didn’t stop.
* * *
“Hey! You!” Olivia called out to Lorelai as she chased Alex towards the stairs. Lorelai glared at her, frustrated in her pursuit.
“What do you want?” she hissed.
“You should let her cool off for a bit. She’s not much fun when she’s angry.”
Lorelai scrunched her nose in distaste. “You think you know her.”
Olivia frowned. “Why shouldn’t I think that? I was with her. I brought her into the world that left marks on your wrists.”
“What do you really know about her? That she likes to be choked? That she can’t stand idiots? You know nothing about her being angry.”
“I know she doesn’t think of other people as human. She doesn’t realize she’s a bitch because she doesn’t process empathy. Everything is about her, and if you go after her, she’ll let you know exactly what you’re worth.”
Lorelai laughed in her face. “Do you have any idea how many times I’ve been accused of that same thing? I know it’s true for me, and it might be for her, but it’s bullshit if you say it’s not true for you too.”
“You’re hot, but I can’t understand why she puts up with you.”
Lorelai grinned and started for the stairs again. “You’re hot, but it’s fucking obvious why she dumped you.”
* * *
When Lorelai came in, Alex glanced up from where she lay flopped on the bed. Lorelai nearly stumbled at the sight of her smeared mascara. Alex must be really stunned to let herself appear that human.
“How are you?” Lorelai asked hesitantly.
“You didn’t tell me.”
Lorelai took a breath and tried to meet her gaze, but she couldn’t force herself to, and stared out the window instead. “I don’t… I don’t tell anyone. It’s so hard to find the words.”
Alex nodded. “I know now.”
“What am I supposed to do with that! How am I supposed to look at you now?”
Lorelai hugged herself. Alex looked traumatized.
“I didn’t mean that. But… but how am I supposed to hurt you? When you were just… just that weird hot girl I picked up, I could use you. But…”
“Don’t make me into a victim.” Their eyes locked. “You’ve never hurt me.”
“I’ve made you bleed.”
“So did my first boyfriend. And he got me pregnant, which was ten times worse than anything you did.”
Alex scrubbed her face. “I haven’t been treating you like a person.”
“You’ve never tried to control me. Not like them.”
“I’ve tied you up. I’ve stopped myself from saying so many things so you wouldn’t leave.”
“You didn’t say things?”
“I had to restrain my bitchiness so I wouldn’t chase you away.”
“And that’s what you consider controlling me? Sparing my feelings is controlling me?” Lorelai shook her head. “And you think you don’t treat me like a person? Olivia fucked you up worse than I thought.”
Lorelai knelt next to her and threaded her fingers through her hair.
“Don’t hurt me,” Alex murmured, inexplicably even to herself.
Lorelai leaned in, lifted her head and caught her lips, kissing her. Alex’s mouth opened and they sank down into the pillows together. Hands slid under expensive dresses, crumpling them and pushing them up and out of the way.
The door opened. “Alex? Mrs. Gilmore is leaving, have you seen…” Mrs. Cabot peeked her nose into the room. “Oh! Excuse me.”FIN