July 23rd, 2009

Fake Empire

Iron Man

 Iron Man is an AWESOME movie!

I was watching it with my grandma who has zero short term memory, and she kept on asking whether it was Arnold.  "Is it Arnold?"  it was kinda cute.  And then she kept asking me if he was James Bond, and i was like, "He *wishes* he was James Bond" which is true.

I never watch movies when i ought to, but since i wrote Tony Stark as a character in my latest (poorly received) saga, i figured i should watch it.  For research purposes.

Of course, the moment I fell for it was when the girl reporter accosted him and I was like: "It's Brookie!"  (I said this, aloud)  and then it was like, "OMG Brookie's in a movie with Gwyneth!  Nicole is going to be so pissed!"

Shockingly, Iron Man scores more Blechdel points than most Superhero movies.  It takes out Spiderman (with a whopping 1 point for sexy Kirsten Dunst [I really must be a nerdy comicbook loving boy underneath, because I couldn't give a fig for most dramatic actresses, but i fall so hard for the girls in Superhero movies... And if Paget Brewster was in a superhero movie I would have a heart attack and *die*])  Wait... is MJ the *only* girl in the first movie?  I fell hard for the cute Russian neighbor in Spiderman 2.  but does this mean that Spiderman gets 0 points, and S2 1 point, leaving Iron Man to save the day with 2 points!  2 Female characters!  With names!  (plus cute female soldier in the first scene who dies tragically)  Who actually have a conversation!  And if you try really really hard, about thirty seconds of their conversation is Not About Tony.  In fact, Christine seems pretty impressed to be in the same room as Pepper at all.  Too bad Miss Potts proceeds to act like a bitch and use a daring metaphor of trash removal.

But seriously, Who is doing the dry cleaning in this situation?  And who is looking really sexy in a burgundy shirt and nothing else?

Solid film, in the liberal superhero tradition.  Villainous ethnics are always merely dupes for the truly evil white man.  Weapons are really awesome, but only when you are Responsible!  And girls should be admired for their ability to remain unscathed while running away from explosions and gunshots *while wearing four inch heels*.

And because it is Marvel, the superhero is flawed (Hello Alcoholics Anonymous, my name is Iron Man), but noble, and really just a nerd who overcompensates a bit too much.  The eye candy is not killed to make the hero stronger.  *blech*.  And men can love men, very deeply, without losing an iota of their masculinity.

Personally, Tony's true love seemed to be his computer.  They were so cute together.

So, recap.

Bechdel Rule 2 points out of a possible three.
I can't in good faith give it any femslash thumbs, but as it makes me want to write Tony/Jarvis fic (or Tony/Yinsen), i will give it 2 big slashy thumbs up.
Superhero movie rating 9/10 (The fight scenes did not have the finesse of X-Men 1, and the graphics were not as tummy rumbling as Spiderman)